A sobering reminder and a PSA

It's another reminder of how time (and technology) flies.

When I was Tweenie's age, I sat happily with our LPs listening to the Disney stories that chimed when you were supposed to turn the page. We didn't have a TV, much less a computer or game station, until I was in junior high.

Ok, so we were weird.

When we eventually got on the Modern World train and started the brain-sucking habit of Saturday morning cartoons and after-school Cosby show, my mom thought herself very clever when she'd unplug the TV and VCR, scrambling around the cables so we couldn't watch any more.

She'd chortle to herself upstairs, imagining us looking at the TV in dismay, then shrugging our shoulders and turning to the copies of Dickens she had casually laid out on the coffee table. Little did she realize I knew where the user manual was kept, and my sister and I would be watching the Young & the Restless lickety-split. Of course we did so with the volume down so low we had to sit right beside the speaker, finger on the on/off button in case we should hear her footstep on the stairs.

Now, we have one TV in our house and the computer sits in a corner of our kitchen. I'd like to say this is because I've learned from my own deviousness and the actions of my friends to hide undesirable behavior from their parents, but the truth is we're too cheap to buy a second TV and don't have another convenient space for the computer where the RoadRunner people can drill through my floor and baseboards to provide the basic necessity of life only high-speed internet can offer.

How do those people on dial-up exist?? Just a quick thought...

Last week it paid off in spades. Tweenie was on one of her dozen kiddie sites with BFF. It's one of those interactive ones where you can communicate with other users, and she is quite addicted to it. I heard them giggling over another user's comment, and then snorting laughter and "ewwwwww!"

I glanced over. The message read: "I am really a dude, so do you want to go out with me?"

The two girls were about to continue on with their game paying no further notice to the user whose question hung in cyberspace, forgotten.

I freaked out. I made them sign off and I shut the computer down. BFF went home soon after and I had a chance to talk it over with Tweenie. She had, of course, not taken any of this seriously and assumed it was a stupid joke. I went on at length about the importance of internet safety and anonymity, which led to the carefully treaded discussion of the people (and I use that term lightly) who would exploit children online.

Her eyes grew wider. "So, we're supposed to lie about our name and age on the computer?"

"It's important to not give out any information to someone you don't know because they might use that against you."

"But the dot-com company makes us tell them."

"So we make something up. Choose a new name and birthday, and just put that in each time."

"But then I'll get the birthday points on a different day, not the right one!"

"Trust me, it's important."

"You said it's a sin to lie."

"Ok missie, if you don't believe me you can ask Dad."

Husband was even more upset. He demanded I contact the site administrator, the police, and possibly also the FBI. He talked about getting a new IP address and installing a firewall. He mentioned the possibility of Tweenie avoiding the site altogether. Faced with this two-pronged attack, Tweenie agreed to avoid the site until we had a chance to contact the appropriate entities and deal with the situation.

The next day, I heard her talking to some neighborhood friends. "Yah, I was, like, totally creeped out!"

On the phone to another friend: "That was sooo creepy! And also, like, gross!"

She wore it like a badge of honor. Bragging rights. But I think she got the message.

***

And now for my PSA.

I've noticed that many toys and TV shows advertise websites with games and interactive play. Many of them require that kids create a profile to use all of the features, often asking for detailed personal information. Many of the input fields are not required for site access. Even if the site does not display your information on a profile, it accustoms your child to sharing personal details online and they may not be as wary when other users ask.

Talk to your child about internet safety. If you are comfortable with him/her using certain sites, consider creating an alias. Use a non-identifying email account where required and monitor your child's online activity closely.